For This Child We Prayed...
I cannot tell you how many years I have been dreaming about the day that we would get to share that our son would no longer be an only child. If I am being honest with you I will say that we finally decided to put that dream aside and move on from all the pain we experienced. 2 1/2 years of infertility and a miscarriage this past spring left us feeling hopeless, sad and ready to move on with our life.
Then God showed us he had a different plan. We have since learned that we were getting another chance at this and that maybe, just maybe our rainbow baby is coming after all.
If you're not familiar with what a rainbow baby is, it's what they call a baby born after a miscarriage. Because after every storm comes a rainbow of hope and that's just what this baby is for us. It's hope.
While we contemplated not sharing the news with everyone until a few months from now, we have decided it was time to share the hope and excitement with others instead of hiding it.
It's been a long two months not telling any of our family or friends. If you follow me on social media you know that I share ALL of my life, so not sharing this part of our journey felt like I wasn't being me.
We have had two appointments so far and at both appointments everything looked great. Strong heart beat, perfect size and great growth. All very different than the last pregnancy we experienced. It's not to say we are out of the woods. I realize many people wait until after the first trimester to share, but we have decided that we need the prayers and that we are going to celebrate the gift of life we have been given for as long as we are able to enjoy it.
Pregnancy is a journey and a scary one at that. I wish I could go back to being as clueless as I was during my first one. I had no fears. After our first ultrasound we told everyone, started picking names, planning the nursery and picking out clothes. In our minds we were getting a healthy baby in a few months and that's exactly what happened. Now that I am older and wiser I realize that next few months will be scary, but I also realize that motherhood and life is also very scary. I have made a choice to put my fears aside and believe that God has a plan for our family, and maybe just maybe this blessing that's growing inside of me will get to be a part of our plan.
I want to wrap this up with two things that I think are pretty special.
The first is that they say when a loved one passes away God often gives you another one in return. This past August my grandmother passed away. She was what I would like to call the queen of fertility. She had nine children and was literally a saint. I became pregnant shortly after she passed. I would like to think that she's looking out for me up there. I told my husband shes my guardian angel for this pregnancy. It brings me comfort thinking of her this way.
Lastly I talked about how this baby is called a rainbow baby. I want to share something pretty amazing. EVERY SINGLE DAY since the day I found out I was expecting this baby I see a rainbow. Sometimes a real one in the sky, sometimes in a store or on TV or even on an art project in my son's school. It's amazing but it's my daily reminder to take a deep breath and just enjoy this pregnancy and have hope that is will work out. I find so much joy each day when I see those rainbows.
So that's what we are doing. Taking this pregnancy day by day hoping and praying we make it to May. Thanks for all the support you have given us on our journey thru these hard years. Let's hope this year has lots of happiness in store for us.
ALL OUR LOVE
Kevin, Sarah, Carter and BABY GRIFFITH
"I will not cause pain without something new to be born says the Lord." Isaiah 66:9